Day 3 – Sunday, June 12, 2011 - Ashland City, TN to The Tail of The Dragon

Day 3 – Sunday, June 12, 2011
Ashland City, TN to The Tail of The Dragon

I woke up a little later in the day today, but 6:30 AM still feels early since it was a Sunday. Ronnie had already been to the golden arches to get some coffee for all of us, and of course, a diet coke for Theresa. That was pretty nice of him, but all told, Ronnie is a nice guy. We gathered all our belongings, checked once again for bed bugs, and packed the bikes up and headed eastbound, yet again, towards Nashville Tennessee.

Uncle Pete's (taken by Uncle Pete)

We passed through the city known for it’s country music and ended up in Lebanon at a truck stop named Uncle Pete’s Restaurant. It was time to document again, so I popped out the camera and set up to take a picture of Kathy, Ronnie, and Theresa. Guess what happened next... yup, Uncle Pete came out, welcomed us, and took the picture of all of us in front of his place.

Kathy using technology at Uncle Petes

Uncle Pete was pretty funny, saying "tell the waitress you know me and she'll charge ya double" in his heavy Tennessee accent. He also quipped, "we have a special today. It's an all you can eat plate of food, and if you eat it all, and still hungry, we'll bring ya more and charge ya triple!" We laughed. We sat at a table, and ordered a very nice, but simple breakfast. Theresa had another diet coke. I think she needs help...

Smithville Tennessee

Our route, taking us off the interstate, had us going through Smithville Tennessee. We saw a water tower that said, "Welcome to Smithville" so we had to stop. We set up and took the picture like the tourists that we are and headed to Burgess Falls State Park. The story about that location is that I had been browsing through a magazine named “Country” at the inlaws a few months back. Since waterfalls are peaceful, and it was in the vicinity of our route, and we thought positioning rest stops throughout the road trip was a good thing, we planned on stopping. Well, it was cool, but a 3/4-mile hike in motorcycle gear (jeans, boots, etc) made it a heck of a trek. This is a pretty good location for hiking with moderate trails, but not in gear... We walked back via the fire road, a road that vehicles can travel on, back to the parking lot. Holy smokes it was warm!

Burgess Falls (final)

Burgess Falls (second)

Burgess Falls (first)

We then noticed a guy staring at the black and orange Harley (not the bluish purple Goldwing) again, so I approached him and discussed all things Harley. I think his name was Fred, and he had an Ultra Classic as well. Anyway, a little conversation happened and his buddy, Ted showed up on his Harley. We talked some more about our road trip, and Fred and Ted gave us some good road advice to get to our final destination at The Tail of the Dragon. We took the advice and it turned out to be fair, but we ended up missing the road they both mentioned to take. Oh well.

Kathy and Theresa posing at Burgess Falls

After the waterfall and some various photographs, we went back south to Sparta and got some ice-cold water and some air conditioning. Then, off we went to Crossville Tennessee for some gas and lunch. We found a place called The 19th Hole. It had basic bar food on the menu and some cold beverages. NASCAR was at Pocono and on the TV when we stopped. At this stop, we ate, we drank, and we enjoyed.

The Devil’s Triangle was next on the list. We heard going clockwise from Petros Tennessee was the best route, so we headed there from Crossville. The triangle was a nice ride, but nothing extra special. This road is primarily used for coal trucks to move their ore out of the area to nearby railways to ship to parts around the country. There was a pre courser road prior to Petros that did remind me that I wasn't in Kansas anymore. We also saw things that reminded us of the Ozarks and Arkansas areas, if you know what I mean... (queue Deliverance music here).

Once we were done with The Devil’s Triangle, we headed a little east and some south towards Maryville Tennessee. We planned stop at Wally World for provisions (i.e. jeans, hydrogen peroxide, frozen pizza for dinner, and some beer). A sudden pop-up rainstorm stalled the plans. We sought protection under an overpass for a few minutes, and then motored on to Wal-Mart. Once we strapped the stuff down, and hid the beer due to bootlegging concerns, we headed towards The Tail of The Dragon for our destination.

Plenty of signs warn trucks to not attempt The Tail of The Dragon due to severe road curves called cross backs. However, that is why we came here – on bikes, for the cross backs. Once headed to the dragon, we were met by Tennessee's finest, a trooper from the state highway patrol. I counted around 5 of them while on 129 hwy. This route had us going through Tallassee and bordering the Chilhowee Lake for around 9 miles prior to the dragon.

Once we got to the road that made us come here, it was on like Donkey Kong. Since Ronnie led the triangle, I thought I should lead the dragon. He didn't laugh at my hazards blinking the whole 11 miles and 318 turns. He understands, since he is old enough to be my dad (shhhh!). We got to our hacienda, fairly uneventfully. Well, at least for Ronnie and Theresa. Upon approaching the gate, that I initially went past, I headed towards the drive and got to the keypad that opens the gate and nearly fell over, while on the bike. Hey, it was a steep hill and sharp dropped edges. Anyway, successfully through the gate, we headed up our path. Since it started getting dark, I though it would be a good idea to take off my sunglasses so I could see better. I mean, I was only going 5 mph. After a few choice words from Kathy after I nearly went into the ditch, I straightened out and got safely to the house. We stuck the beer in the freezer to chill and warmed the oven for our recently acquired DiGiorno pizzas. The house needed to be chilled down a little and there was not any ice made in the freezer, but hey, that was ok, cause we were on vacation!

The Cabin View

The view from the deck overlooking the Cheoah Lake was most excellent. We sat outside for a while, drinking beers and summarizing the day’s riding. The clouds were still prevalent throughout the mountain range, so the sun setting to our backs made for a nice orange and pink sky as our view. There were even some whippoorwills doing their thing in the background. We also think we heard a mileormore bird too. You know, the birds that fly backwards, the wind gets in it's yahoo, and you can hear it from around a mile or more? (drum kick and cymbals)

Anyway, we all started to discuss the next days plans, as to which direction or specific ride we wanted to enjoy. There was no decision, but the plan was to sleep on it and devise a plan in the morning. Down in the Smokies, there were way to many choices to stick in 2-3 days of riding. However, one of the ideas generated was to go visit our good friends, Rhonda and Larry Brown, who were in Destin Florida at their vacation spot for the week. The idea was not off the table, yet, but we thought that it was a ways to go and still get back to work on Monday...

Winged Rodent - Bat

We came inside once it was totally dark, enjoyed our pizza, and watched the TV for some news, specifically for the weather forecast. They were calling for isolated showers for Monday for the area. We ensured we had our raingear ready, just in case! While doing that, Ronnie went out to the carport to secure his bike and noticed a bat (winged rodent) laying on the step from the kitchen. Naturally, I had to document the bat, so I grabbed the camera and snapped a couple of pictures of it. Those things are freaky looking.

Some revelations for this third leg of the road trip:

• Long day riding + steep incline + heavy bike = worrisome navigating.
• Ronnie’s bike = quiet. Mine = not so much.
• Beer in freezer for 30 minutes works great. 2 hours, not so much.
• DiGiorno pizza is pretty good, with beer.
• No Internet connection at rental house = Internet Rehab. We lived.
• 330 miles this day - give or take – click here our general route.

Day 2 – Saturday, June 11, 2011 - Wheatland, MO to Ashland City, TN

Day 2 – Saturday, June 11, 2011
Wheatland, MO to Ashland City, TN

To excited to sleep, I arose at 4:45 AM to start the day. My first battle of the day, the *&%$#@& coffee pot... Have you ever gone to a guest’s house and try to figure out the coffee pot at o-dark-thirty and try not to make noise? Well, if you haven’t, it does not work!

Ronnie sat in the kitchen mocking me, but unwilling to lend a hand. It already had coffee grounds in it, so I added water to the holding tank and turned it on. Let's just say, the coffee was 1) less than warm and 2) tasted like cold water. Oh yeah, and the microwave was less than operational too. Coffee maker 1, rob 0.

Kathy, Pa, Ronnie, and Theresa
at Ma and Pa's house (cell pic)

Ma and pa provided an awesome bacon and egg sandwich for the crew. We discussed the day’s travels, which planned on getting us close to Nashville, TN. The southern route of Missouri, via MO-60, proved to be beautiful this day. The forecast was for sunny skies and no rain. Perfect! I waited for Ronnie to start his bike (so we could hear that it was started), started my semi-quiet HD up, and got on the road around 7:45 AM and headed to Springfield Missouri.

After stopping at the golden arches in Buffalo Missouri (so Theresa could get a diet coke), we arrived at Genes Gallery to look for the right-side cover that Ronnie lost in back Harrisonville. The price tag was $400 for the part. He left without it... We headed a little more south on MO-65 to MO-60 eastbound. Yes, the Smokey and the Bandit theme song rang through my mind as well, and I think I even sang it on the CB for Kathy, Ronnie, and Theresa to hear. It was poised to be a seasonably warm day in southern Missouri, with a high of 90 and a lot of humidity.

Headed to see how long the wait was... (cell pic)

Our short-term goal was to hit Sikeston Missouri for lunch at Lambert's Cafe, for a hearty meal and some famous “throwed rolls.” We got to Lambert's Cafe around 1:00 PM on Saturday and finally sat down for lunch 45 minutes later. Yes, we waited that long, which was not favorable if we were going to get to Nashville Tennessee that day, but hey, it was Lambert’s Cafe. As we waited, we found out that there are special seats that can become available, which are not in the regular seating area. The process includes the host calling for a seating of four to skip the line, first come, first served. We were in the opportune spot, near the host stand when this was called. If not, no telling how much longer we were going to wait.

Lambert’s Cafe has great menu options for dining, but the “throwed rolls” are what they are really famous for. The servers were entertaining as well as the pianist near our VIP seats. They brought around fixins during our stay that were on top of the rolls and regular dinner. Burp! Lamberts throwed rolls are hot, as is their complimentary fried okra. They also push the fried potatoes, tomatoes and macaroni, and even apple butter or molasses for said throwed rolls. Not a single one of us finished the meal at this stop. Theresa and Kathy even got a to go box for their leftover chicken and catfish. Ronnie and I both chose to leave the morsels left over from our respective open face beef sandwiches there.

Praying or looking at the
menu, you decide! (cell pic)

30 minute wait at Lambert's
Cafe turned in to a 45 minute
wait... (cell pic)

After stopping for lunch, we gassed up the bikes, then I waited for Ronnie to start his bike (so we could hear that it was started), started my semi-quiet HD up and headed towards Paducah Kentucky. There were pending rainstorms coming in from our south and west, so we headed out of town quickly. There is a toll ferry that takes cars and bikes across the Mississippi river, but that was in the way of the storm. Forging ahead and a little north, and a little east, we managed to make it through Cairo Illinois and down to the Kentucky Dam, near Paducah Kentucky. What a site that was... there were multiple power grids, water locks, and lots of water. The river was not flowing very well, due to the flooding they are trying to control these days, however it was a sight to see.

We ventured through some side roads and then caught I-24 again and headed towards Nashville. I realized that we spent more time on this interstate highway than desired, but there was not a real good way to get to Nashville in the time desired. You see, my personal goal was to hit 500 miles on this day. For one reason, which I convinced the rest of the group – we wanted Sunday to be easy so we could take our time and see some sights. For another reason, I had planned a surprise for Kathy and Theresa.

No Tell Motel in Ashland City TN

Once we got to an exit pretty near to Ashland City Tennessee, which is just north and west of Nashville. We stopped for some water (seriously this time) at a gas station and checked out motels and hotels on our phones. Most everything was booked due to the 2011 CMA Music Festival in Nashville that weekend. We lucked out, kind of, since we found a room available in Ashland City. Well, we at least got a couple of rooms, at the no-tell-motel, named Relax Inn. However, I was not sure I could relax, nor could anyone else, due to the less than desirable appearance and uncanny odors in the rooms. Never the less, there were not many options, so we took a chance.

Once checked in, we headed back in to town to El Ray Mexican Restaurant for some dinner and a couple of celebratory adult beverages. After all, Theresa and Kathy earned it right? A while back, Ronnie and I did an Iron Butt “Saddle Sore 1000” last September, but the girls did not go with us. You may or may not know, but the recognition Ronnie and I received was due to riding over 1,000 miles in less than 24 hours (1,070 miles in 19 hours and 20 minutes). On this ride, the 500 miles was nearly as tiring as the 1,000 miles we did on September 11, 2010. It was way warmer and our bikes were loaded down with more gear.

Kathy and Theresa did it, and with minimal complaining. They hit over 500 miles in less than 12 hours and my planned surprise could finally be told. Since I thought the girls deserved at least some recognition, I had planned the Saturday to be a full day of riding, in hopes hitting over 500 miles. It was to get them an Iron Butt award of their own. At dinner, I began baiting Theresa and Kathy slightly by stating that I wished that there were an award that recognized such a feat. I mentioned that there should be an award, but just would not know what to call it. Theresa was quick to say, “Well I would call it a Half Ass Award!” My reaction was laughter, as I pulled out some sheets of paper, which I had prepared prior to leaving on our journey, and I made an official announcement. I said, “Kathy Smith and Theresa Wolfe, you did a near miraculous thing today. You each rode over 500 miles in less than 12 hours. What an accomplishment! I have talked to the association that bestows honors for such great feats such as this and would like to give you each an award certificate for a 'Half Ass 500' in recognition." Laughter and tears of joy ensued. We kept it festive with beers and great mexican food.

Kathy and Theresa with their awards

We headed home shortly by way of a local Rite Aide, to pick up water, parlor beer, and Lysol. Each were needed for our stay at no-tell-motel. Kathy had dropped her goggles in the parking lot of the restaurant, so we went back to get them prior to getting to Rite Aide. Good news, they were there and not ran over. Cool part of this portion of the trip, a new friend from Ashland City let us use his Rite Aide frequent shopper card for a $0.37 discount. wOOt! wOOt!

Ronnie with Beer God gifts

Kathy and Theresa went in and hit the rooms hard with the chemicals as Ronnie and I unloaded the bikes. We got settled and had some more beers in the parlor as we recalled the day’s events. We were headed for bed, but wait... You see, I was thinking earlier that a couple more beers would be a great idea, but we were out. All all of a sudden, a beer god showed up and gave us a six pack of bud light. Score! Best thing was, he had the Tennessee accent and he was driving a white Pontiac Trans Am, with minimal exhaust. Albeit that a beer god does not actually drive a white TA, in my mind that is, but all was good on this leg of being east bound and down. Before heading for bed, we pushed our bikes under the eaves of the motel due to forecasted rain overnight.

Some revelations for this second leg of the road trip:

· Jalapeño cheese on bacon and egg sandwich is awesome (and worth subsequent intragastric problems)

· Ronnie was up at 4:30 AM and stayed up until 11:05 PM. I think he might have taken a nap on I-24 when I wasn’t looking. If he really stayed up that late, I think Kathy and I are wearing on him.

· If given the right direction, motorcycles can outrun a 13mph rain front with ease.

· I'm officially scared of bed bugs, even if they weren’t existent.

· Too much Lysol, in confined spaces, is a bad experience.

· Water is your friend on trips like this.

· Friends are like water on trips like this.

· 525 miles this day - give or take – click here our general route.

Day 1 – Friday, June 10, 2011 - Kansas City Missouri to Wheatland Missouri

Day 1 – Friday, June 10, 2011
Kansas City Missouri to Wheatland Missouri

I had minimal battles with Kathy on packing, but I could tell that she surely brought more stuff than me. There is quite a bit of room on a Harley Davidson Ultra Classic, but I think Kathy was determined to get plenty of stuff in there to fill all the nooks and crannies. We even filled up a Nelson Rigg CL-800 (with expandable pockets that were expanded to their limits). The plan was to pack light so that we could purchase local souvenir t-shirts along the way. The saddlebags were filled with motorcycle traveling necessities, including tools, an air pump, some tire plugs, a day/night cover, and all of our rain gear. I guess I should fess up... I did my share of filling some of the tour pack space with camera gear, but isn't that more important?

The forecast was not looking very good for Friday travel, since there were storms moving through. Around 10:00 AM of Friday, a pretty good storm hit our area. But it started to clear off nearly as rapid as it came in. We were in contact with Ronnie and Theresa about a desired time to leave town, which was around 1:15 PM. It was a pretty warm day with a temperature around 87 and a chance for rain.  We met Ronnie and Theresa at the nearest gas station to fill up the tank before heading out on our venture. After filling up, I reset my trip odometer to zero, then waited for Ronnie to start his bike (so we could hear that it was started), started my semi-quiet HD up, and and headed south.

There were no significant events on the first day, other than... 30 or so miles into the trip, Ronnie realized he lost his side cover off his Honda Goldwing while going down the road. Not to fear, Ronnie devised a quick plan to get another side cover, at least he thought so. Very near that same time, my GPS dropped from the bracket and the device fell off our bike and skidded down the same road. I did think the GPS looked pretty cool skidding on the road at 70 mph as well. You know, kind of like skipping a rock on a pond?

At the D and R Tavern in Clinton MO

We made the turn at Harrisonville and ended up at the D and R Tavern in Clinton, Missouri for a big glass of water (cough). The friendship of the townsfolk was instantaneous since we parked two of the best looking bikes outside their establishment. Most of the comments about our bikes were directed towards the black and orange Harley, which Ronnie didn’t quite get. Once we finished our waters, we were on our way to the in-laws. We pointed the bikes in the general direction of their house, since it was to be our destination for Friday evening.

Kathy in The Parlor

Again, the goal of this road trip was to get off the main roads as much as possible. Some know heading south on MO-13 can get built up with traffic. Since we were in the mode of getting on some curvy roads, we hopped off MO-13 and onto T Hwy, which goes through Gerster (population, not very many) in to Wheatland. Theresa quipped over channel 8, “We should open a bar in Gerster!” We all laughed, since there did not appear to be any form of life in that town, and continued on to Wheatland.

A Cool Ride in The V Parking Lot

Marie, Kathy, and Melissa at "The V"

Once we pulled up, we all received a warm greeting from Jim and Marie (ma and pa) Kenny. There was plenty of time to chat out in Jim’s “parlor”, which also serves as a driveway under the deck overlooking the golf course. There were also some friends that came over to say hi from the golf course. They were druuuuuunk! After mocking them for a bit, and fixing the failed GPS bracket (I actually saved it from dropping), we were on our way to "The V" 'cause it's "the place to be!" Well, that's what the locals say anyway. We shared a happy hour $5.50 pitcher (cough) of water and headed back to the homestead to cook some burgers and brats for dinner. Once dinner was over, the bed gods were calling... What a day!

Some revelations for this first leg of the road trip:

• Beer is like water and visa versa.
• I hope I set my out of office messages up.
• Ronnie’s bluish bike sure is quiet when he starts it. Almost like its not even on…
• There were free movies this weekend on direct tv and dish, thanks to the multiple announcements by JimJoeBob at “The V” – There was to be a Gunsmoke marathon all day Saturday. It had me almost rethinking this ride... (not really)
• Cajun mustard is good on grilled hamburgers.
• 150 miles this day - give or take – click here our general route.

Road Trip: To The Tail of The Dragon (foreword)

Road trips are fun, right? Well, the case of the most recent trip I went on, fun was an understatement. My name is Rob Smith, who is just a guy that likes to have a good time, which sometimes includes riding motorcycles and being adventurous. Beginning Friday, June 10^th, I traveled with my wife, Kathy, and two good friends, Ronnie and Theresa Wolfe. Kathy and I were riding a black and orange 2007 Harley Davidson Ultra Classic Screamin Eagle. Theresa and Ronnie were riding an illusion blue 2002 Honda Goldwing (with no fancy letters or manly catchy phrases added). Both equipped with intercoms and CB’s for internal and external communication.

Other than getting to our cabin in the Smoky Mountains by Sunday evening, we didn’t really have any set plans on our 10-day road trip. There weren’t really any rules either, other than minimizing travel on interstate highways. Oh yeah, and no wise cracks about Ronnie’s age. However, I felt I could poke a jab here and there, since I am a card-carrying AARP member (fact, but only by proxy).

I took the liberty to journal our adventure. Most of the memories were captured from my viewpoint. However, some of the others provided some input. Of course, the contact we had with people we met along the way provided some good interaction as well. I hope you enjoy a recap of our recent road trip to The Tail of the Dragon.

Red Barn Farm

Last fall, I came across a red barn near Pomme De Terre lake. Pomme is a corp lake in the central and eastern portion of Missouri. The gravel road traveled to get here was a little to be desired, but the image proved worth it!